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Tuesday, August 26, 2014

It Is Stupid What Has Gone On Around My Life And Some People Have Some Explaining To Do
So much has gone on since I first started my blog and I'm pissed with how my life has turned out. I only went on a couple of rants on my blog due to media attention around my life. While in the homeless missions I ranted about declaring war on the United States of America, that was due partly to George W Bush as President saying on TV, "If anyone does anything for the telepath there will be war" and I have a complex about telepathy with my mental health condition. Then there are media rumours that my Google money was or has been seized by Bush and Prime Minister Harper, I do not know what to believe.If I had Google money I would not have ended up in the homeless missions.
Then there are media reports that I am condemed as a Priest in poverty which is a load of crap and it pisses me off royaly. With all this media attention around my life why can't I get a media interview to clear the air about a few things that are being said about me. Certain media reports play over and over vin my head and I do not know what to do about it. From the stress of some of the media reports surrounding my life and excessive caffiene from drinking coke I get the involuntary muscle contractions in my stomach and mouth which I should not be getting since I am on a low dosage of pillso control them instead of the injections. I relapsed with trying to quit smokingvand I am smoking again. I did not bad not smoking staying with my Mum but when I came back to the room by myself I could not handle it and started smoking again. As I am typing there are media reports about my story on the radio and I do not know what to make of it all, so till later I'm signing off. 

Tuesday, August 12, 2014

It is my 54th birthday tomorrow and I must lead the most boring depressing life going
I have no life and it is depressing, no money to do any thing, no amount of friends and I spend most of the time alone listening to the radio or going to my mother's and watching the News on TV. One thing I am trying to accomplish is giving up smoking. I am on day four with no cigarette being smoked, I only blasted the scattered bit of tobacco from the ash tray in a pipe before I got the Nicorette inhaler. What got me to give up smoking was getting a white lesion in my mouth from smoking according to my student dentist. did have a bit of a bad cough with flem from smoking for the greater part of 40 years. 
A lot of the time I am on the edge of tears the way my life turned out, now I really hate being a mental health consumer and can not stand the stupidity of dealing with Psychiatrists.I did get off the injections and on pills of my choise to control the involuntary muscle contractions I get between my stomach and mouth. The Psychiatrist does not even know me and he said that eventually he will get a court order to inject me with medication again thus inducing the involuntary muscle contractions once more.
The Psychiatrist wants me to get into my art again for something to do but I have no place to stock pile art for nothing and no real money to invest in art with no one to show the art to. what do I want to get back into art for, it makes no sense now.

I still have the Tribunal Administratif  to deal with after being unjustly arrested for harassment and forced to plead guilty to make things easy for my Lawyer at the time. That will be never ending crap in my life,the Tribunal even stigmatizes the patient as guilty with no understanding of the truth and not interested in finding out the truth. So I am stuck seeing a Psychiatrist and taking pills until the Tribunal hearings are over with one day.
So I lead a boring depressing life with no avenue to change any thing!